Smiling

Dear Daddy,

I love you so much! You make me smile like this ALL DAY LONG!!!

Your Son


Dear Son,

When you smile like this, when it touches your eyes, I can feel it deep down in my soul. It makes me feel so goo to know that you have authentic joy.
 
The Bible say, "A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." - Proverbs 17:22 (ESV). Your smile has been that medicine that has allowed my crushed spirit to be healed. Your joyful heart pours out from this beautiful face. I love you more than life.

Your Father 

I Thought You Were Catholic.

 Dear Daddy,

Everybody is really excited that you are going to be in school to be a pastor. But I heard your friend say something about you being a Catholic. What does that mean? Does it mean you can't be a pastor?

Your Son

 Dear Son,

Yes, I am considered a Catholic but that just means I am a part of the bigger Christian picture. Catholics are just one of many denominations, or groups, of people that believe Jesus was the son of God and God all at once, otherwise known as Christians.

Each denomination has slightly different traditions and interpretations of what the Bible means or how Jesus is to be honored and worshiped. For example, Roman Catholics do not allow their priests (pastors) to be married. See? Even among the Catholic tradition there is division. These divisions typically come from man-made issues rather than any real issues of faith.

I can be a pastor but I cannot be a Roman Catholic priest and I am okay with that. I enjoy many of the Catholic traditions and rituals but those are not what make me a Christian. Belief in Jesus as the son of God and that His death and subsequent resurrection paid price of death for my sins is what makes me a Christian. Regardless of individual denominational structure, all it takes to be a Christian is to believe that you have been saved by grace through faith. Anyone who tells you otherwise is missing the point of the mission of Christ and why He died on a cross.





Your Father

Impact of Suffering

Dear Daddy,

When I look at you it makes me smile. You always smile back. You must be a very happy Daddy. I cry sometimes. I bet you never cried in your life, huh Daddy?

Your Son





Dear Son,


You might see me as a fountain of smiles right now but that is only because everything you do is cute! I've cried my fair share of tears though. Remember those essays I wrote to those people the other day? One of them was about this very thing. The people wanted me to tell them all about how an experience of suffering and loss effected my life. I think I'll share the story with you too:

The event of greatest suffering and loss, which led to adversity, that I have experienced in
my life actually occurred when I was ten-years old. At that age, my father died. The effects of this event would reverberate through the next twenty years of my life, to one extent or another.

Up until my father died I was an honor roll student with exemplary behavior. His death

brought with it a lot of anger and hatred toward my family and even God. I could not understand why he was taken from me and I would not be consoled. I was a child but looking back I can see that my behavior was self-destructive and selfish. My grades began to slip and I eventually failed the eighth grade. I went from listening to country music as a child to death metal as a young teen. I was in a very dark place and I believe I had convinced myself that it was what I deserved.

An unfortunate side effect of this behavior was the impact that it had on my two younger

sisters. They followed my lead and eventually became examples of the worst I had shown them. They both have grown into adults with their own lives but I can still see the impact of watching their big brother behave poorly.

My mother gave up on me early on and I honestly cannot say that I blame her for this initial
reaction. I truly made it difficult to love me. Jesus, though, makes it a habit out of loving the
unlovable and He would not let me wander in the darkness forever. All I needed to do was ask
him to light my path.

Looking back, I can see that God put people in my life to make sure I never went beyond

hope. They helped me deal with the anger I had stored up about my father’s death. I found that
the love of others is more powerful than hate and anger. My step-father, sisters, and wife have all shown me the power of this love.

Ultimately, what I have learned from the death of my father is that we were not built to

deal with pain and suffering alone. We need other people and Jesus Christ to help bear the
weight of the burden of grief. Never again will I allow myself to be crush by the weight of despair. I am not alone and I don’t need to act like I am.

So there you have it, my childhood recollection of that horrible time. Some of it may be altered from other's perceptions due to my viewing it through a child's eyes. This is how I remember it though and that makes it reality for me.

Your Father   

Father Son Relationship

Dear Daddy,

I've heard you and Mommy talking about some very serious stuff the last couple of weeks. You are writing letters to other people now?? What do THEY want to know?

 

Your Son

 

Dear Son,

 

It is true that there are some serious situations taking place in our lives right now. I am writing letters to only you. To others, I am writing essays! They asked me how my relationship with Jesus started and how it is going now. Here is what I had to say:

 

My relationship with Jesus Christ began at the age of eighteen when, as I worked as a dishwasher for a pizza place, I closed my eyes and asked Jesus into my heart over a sink full of grease. I was part of a group of men, most in their forties and fifties, who were preparing to deliver witnesses of how God had been working a particular fruit of the spirit into their lives. I was challenged by the group to discern if I truly had a place among them due to the fact that I had never received Jesus before. I spent many a night laboring over those dirty dishes wondering where I stood and what asking Jesus into my life might mean. After a couple months of praying with that group, I realized that I needed Jesus. I need Him to free me from the burden of sin and shadow of self-doubt that I had been living under. Thus began an interesting walk with the Lord.

 

As a new Christian I was on fire, telling everyone who would listen about the wonders Jesus was working within me. I attended church every Sunday and grew to have an amazing family there. I asked the pastor question after question in search for truth and clarification of things that I found confusing. Eventually, I moved away from that area and lost touch with most of the people that helped me to form the foundations of my Christianity.

    Things changed when I took a speech class in college. I  enjoy a good debate and often found myself taking a stance opposite the popular view in my speeches. I decided to see if I could do a convincing speech on what I perceived to be historical inaccuracies in the Bible. This was one of the most foolish undertaking I have ever been a part of and one I regret to this day. In the end, I quit that class and found myself back pedaling from Jesus. I was more confused than ever. But Jesus is ever-faithful to his followers.

 

The current nature of our relationship is one of revelations and acceptance. The path my life is suppose to go on is being revealed to me through the people in it as well as situations that I find outside of my control, which  are many. Jesus has been patient with me and my questioning nature. However, He has taken a more aggressive tone as of late and it is because of this that I know I am being called into ministry. For one reason or another that door has been closed to me since I was eighteen and considered it then. Now however, the foundation has been laid and the door open. It is time I fully listened to Jesus and walk with him through it and into my future.

 

Now you know how I got my start.

Your Father

 

 

 

 

I Thought I Was Ready - part 2

Dear Daddy,

You said this before:

They say you can't change others and that is true. However, sometimes an interaction or a situation comes along and changes the heart of a person. In turn, this changes the way they view everyone else.

What does that have to do with me?

Your Son

Dear Son,

It means I had a hard heart before you came along. Your mother could not change that, no one could. She was a great buffer for the outside world though.

When I say I had a hard heart, I mean this: people and everything humans did annoyed me beyond belief and I always took the critical view. I never bothered to look past stupid actions to the people behind them. Instead, I was judgmental and harsh on these people. I am using past tense here but this is a current problem and is a work in progress.

Your arrival seems to have drop-kicked my heart though. It is chipping away and this hard exterior. I suddenly view these people through your eyes. Right now, I find myself looking at everyone differently. That is not to say that stupidity is any more okay, not at all. However, I seems to be wanting to give these people a little more benefit of the doubt. I find myself asking why and I think I figured it out.

You see son, you seem to be a terrific judge of character. You smile at just about everyone no matter what they have done in the past. You don't know what they have done or said and it makes no difference to you anyway. This allows you to approach almost every human being with authentic joy and amazement.

I think my change in heart is a subconscious desire to want to be more like that, like you. To find joy in simple things and love in unlikely people. Your heart has not be hardened against the ways of the world and I love that about you. It occurs to me that one of the quickest ways for your view to change is for me to show you a different way. When it comes to this, I do not want to show you a different way. Your way is just fine, better than fine. It is the way a heart should be: open, authentic and accepting.

I've had many years of cynicism indoctrination. My views will not change overnight but I do take a second look at situations and people before comment these days. That doesn't always change the outcome of my word choices though I want it to. I want you to grow up in a home where love is not only given to you but shown how to give to others as well.

One of the many gifts God has instilled in you is the ability to affect the heart of men. I will see that gift cultivated for use in His kingdom. It starts with me. I will be your first test subject.

With love,

Your Father

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I Thought I Was Ready - Part 1

The only constant is change.

Dear Daddy,

You mentioned in a previous letter that you waited a long time for me. Does that mean you were ready for me to come along?

Your Son

Dear Son,

We did have to wait a long time for you, seven years to be exact. However, no amount of waiting and preparation can make a person ready for the birth of a child. We might have thought we were but we were not. That is not to say that we were not anticipating your arrival, far from it. We waited like excited children nearing Christmas morning. The present was well worth it too. But how did we prepare?

We obtained every item we could think of ahead of time. We painted your room and we put up that cute monkey border. Bottles, clothes, bedding, dressers and travel gear were all purchased or received as gifts. We were ready. Then, you were born and everything changed.

When I say everything, I mean everything but mostly I am talking about attitudes and relationships. Let's be real, the way we interact with others IS everything.

They say you can't change others and that is true. However, sometimes an interaction or a situation comes along and changes the heart of a person. In turn, this changes the way they view everyone else.

I'll keep this letter short and expound on what I mean in my next letter. You have changed me for the better, little man. You are kind of like John the Baptist in that I believe you have come to prepare me for something new. I'll explain later.

Your Father

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Do You Pray, Daddy?

Hand in hand.

Dear Daddy,

Do you pray? You bow your head sometimes when other people do but you don't look like a lot of them when they pray. You never say the words out loud either. Don't you want God to hear you?

Your Son

Dear Son,

Yes, I do pray. I may not look like some of the others but I do pray. In our world today, every person feels the right to express him or herself as an individual in all that they do, including when worshiping and praying. But - just as in many things - people want to be noticed when they do these things. I do not.

The book of Matthew states that we should pray in secret and not outwardly for others to see in chapter six. Corinthians 1 asks how outsiders can say Amen to our prayers if we say them with our spirits. Son, I pray with my heart, my mind, and soul...not my mouth. I give praise and thanks with that.

I am not saying that every person that prays publicly is a hypocrite. There are plenty of places in the Bible where it talks about praying openly. I have life experience though. My experiences have allowed me to draw one sad conclusion: the louder a Christian prays publicly, the more you should watch your back around them.

Ultimately, I want you to pray, be it loud or in secret. I truly want you to talk to your Father in heaven. He has a lot to say. Just remember that if your mouth is moving, your heart generally is not.

Prayerfully yours,

Your Father

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In No Time

Get used to these bars kid!

Dear Daddy,

I love my new bed! This crib thing has way more room than the swing. I can roll around all over the place. Why didn't you think of this sooner?

Your Son

Dear Son,

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 makes it clear that God has a time for all things. I can't begin to comprehend this timing but not trusting in it has caused you, Mommy and me lots of unnecessary grief.

For instance, I'll bet you didn't know that Mommy and I waited over seven years of our marriage for you. We got so angry at the world and even God because we were like impatient little children, we wanted what we wanted when we wanted it.

But God picked the exact right time to bring you along. If I had known how amazing you'd be, I would gladly have waited in silence. You were definitely worth waiting a lifetime for.

The same timing was at work with your crib sleep. You see, we DID TRY to put you there weeks ago. But just like your Mommy and I weren't ready for you to come any sooner, you were not ready for that big bed. It wasn't time yet.

We get so wrapped up in trying to make things happen instead of looking and listening to the signs of readiness that we end up banging our heads in frustration. If we could just learn to wait for God to make us ready, then we would find that our efforts to introduce change and growth go much easier.

I hope this a lesson that the three of us can take with us as we move forward. Life is not a competition. There is no race to win as we are all heading to one of two places. We can learn from those that have come before us and even attempt to emulate the good parts. However in the end, if it is not your time for something to happen, then it will not. Plain and simple.

Enjoy your new bed.

Your Father

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I'm Gettin' Nuthin'

You big meanie!!!

Dear Son,

Did it bother you that your Mommy and I gave you no candy or presents on your first Easter? Are you afraid that all of us will have missed out on those memories forever?

Concerned,

Your Father

Dear Daddy,

I am only sixteen weeks old and don't even know who I am yet, let alone what a chocolate bunny is. I'd rather just play with my feet and suck on my hand than a ratty old stuffed animal anyway. Besides, my needs are simple and few: feed me, rest me, change me, play with me, hold me, and love me. Got it? Good.

As for the memories, do you remember YOUR first Easter...or second...or third? Thought not. I bet you will remember my first Easter though, even without the candy and presents. It is the one where you hid out all day playing playstation in order to avoid the chaos that is Holiday Family Dinner, right? I bet you will remember how Mommy held me all day and that I crashed hardcore when we got home too.

I wish I could have gotten some of the cool things my cousins did. Oh wait, no I don't. I'd rather just suck on my fist some more.

Don't worry about it, Daddy. The best memory you'll have about my first Easter is this: Laura Barton rocking me to sleep while Mommy smiled at watching you sing with the church choir. The song was Written In Red, wasn't it? Then, all of those people surrounding me after the service to hold me and hug me. They thought I was just the cutest thing. You and Mommy were so proud. Remember that? Yeah, that is the stuff worth remembering anyway. Not some silly little basket full of plastic grass.

Fist-suckingly Yours,

Your Son

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Easter Egg Jesus

Yep...Easter Egg Jesus.

Dear Daddy,
Resurrection. Springtime. Eggs. Chocolate. Bunnies. I can see the beauty in combining all of these things. Why do people feel the need to argue about the "true meaning of Easter?"
Your Son


Dear Son,
As with many creations, including man, the confusion and discord comes from trying to understand simplicity and complexity at the same time. Easter is both of these things in extremity. It is simple because Easter represents new life. People complicate the issue by attaching various religious beliefs to the concept.

Jews represent this in Passover. During the ten plagues, Jews painted lambs blood on their doorways allowing the angel of death to pass over their homes. This act gave the first born male Jews a new chance at life, in other words a new life. Christians had the blood of The Lamb, or Jesus Christ, shed for us. The blood-letting and subsequent resurrection gives all those who believe that He is the son of God this new life.

Where do eggs, chocolate, and bunnies come from and how do they fit into the new life theme? Bunnies and eggs represent the best of spring and exemplify life bursting forth in a young (new) and vivacious (lively) way. Chocolate? Well, who doesn't enjoy a treat to make things feel new? Simple, right?

The worst of Easter's complexity falls in people deciding that they have to be right...all...the...time. The problem with being right is that people often overlook the big picture in lieu of small, unimportant details. Yes, the final covenant was forged with the shedding of the blood of The Lamb. However, when the Jews were passed over, they were given new life as well. Since both represent the core of what new life is about, does it really matter who has the right of it?

Jew or Gentile, all of humanity belongs to God. Man must look to Him for truth and understanding. As for chocolate. Well, consider it an enigma that transcends human understanding.

Your Father

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